Some thoughts on internet dating

I was recently asked, out of the blue, if (in the event of me becoming single) whether I'd do internet dating. My off-the-cuff reply was something like 'yes, if I was lonely'.

Having had time to think about the question my answer is different.

Coincidentally I recently saw a clip on TV where they talked to people aged perhaps 55 plus who had found partners through internet dating. One widow said she had met 40 guys (over 3/4 years) and had married no 41 and was extremely happy.

Result! But actually I think there must be more than perseverance behind the process of dating as many as 41 people. I.e. finding someone who meets the criteria for a full relationship may not be the only motive: it can be interesting just meeting new people. It's different from spending time with your mates - you're going to have a laugh with friends and share experiences and possibly hardships, but you probably aren't going to get to know them a whole lot better than you do already.

With someone new, who has self-filtered by registering on a dating web site and therefore declaring themselves interested in new relationships, there's a good chance that your date is going to be open to talking about themselves and finding out about you. Admittedly some of your dates are going to be self-centred and/or opinionated, and into the former at the expense of the latter. (There's more risk here for women because there are undoubtedly more men who are up their own arses than is the case with women.) But I would guess that most of the time it's going to be an interesting experience, and sometimes fun.

It's always going to be a percentage thing, but I reckon internet dating is a massive facilitator to anyone seeking a relationship, especially anyone beyond those college days when you automatically meet loads of new people.

So if I was asked that question again my answer would be an unqualified 'yes', even if I wasn't specifically looking for a partner.

(Interestingly when I posed the hypothetical 'if I died would you try internet dating?' to C, without time to blink she turned the question around, answered it on my behalf, predicted an outcome, and replied 'You'd make sure the boys were OK wouldn't you?' I guess there's something complimentary in the assumption that I'd have no trouble finding a partner and getting married again(!), but instead of answering the question, her main concern was that the new Mrs R wouldn't inherit the vast family financial empire. Anyway marriage would be out of the question; I just don't think Jennifer Lawrence would be interested.)