The Chanel bottle

 C likes to have surprise presents at Christmas and birthdays, no matter what you else you get her, so it was with some satisfaction that, last summer, I covertly ascertained that she likes Chanel No 5. I don't think she's ever had this; recent fragrances have been from Jo Malone, and through most of our lives such an extravagance would have been out of reach.

So, super-organised, in October I slip into John Lewis after an afternoon trip to the pictures (to see Dune - ace by the way). With my rucksack in tow (the smart one for town, not the grubby one for walking) I'm sure I can get the purchase home and hidden safe from discovery. All goes well, since I know exactly what to ask for. The package is popped into a classy little mini-carrier with ribbony handles and I've paid by card and have my rucksack  open ready when, before I can yell STOP, the shop assistant has reached for a bottle and sprayed the whole lot! Disaster! The mini-carrier now reeks of Chanel and I don't have a cat in hell's chance of getting that into the house under the nose of C!

But problem-solving is fun. Carefully holding the aromatic package away from my clothes I leg it down the mall to Tesco's where I purchase a box of zip-close freezer bags, safely ensconce the perfume box in one, and dump the smelly bag in a bin. With the smell securely zipped up, the journey home is a breeze.

But there's a problem with buying surprises too early - you have to hide them reasonably well...

And by Christmas Eve I haven't the foggiest idea where the wretched perfume is! I've searched all my drawers, looked in the attic, cellar, even the summer house on the basis that I may have gone overboard to hide any possible leaking aroma. 

After going everywhere twice I'm forced to give up and wrap up a note in an empty box. 

Needless to say, this causes great hilarity.

Then, late on Boxing Day, C asks "Where's that magazine you got me?" I go to the place I think it's stashed and, yes, there it is. Along with a zip-up poly bag containing box of Chanel No 5! In a draw I have already searched!!!

Shame, really. It would have done as a birthday present in February.